September 12, 2009

Memorial Days

Well, by the time that many of you read this the day will be Sunday, September 13, 2009.

On Thursday of last week I found myself remembering September 11, 2001 - it seems somewhat ridiculous to chronicle the events of that morning, one that started with simply waking for work; however, I have to remember that I did not sleep the night before and consequently woke late. Oddly enough, while we as people tend to become incredibly focused on ourselves when experiencing the domino effect of losing time, I distinctly remember thinking that something was terribly, terribly wrong on that day: that the level of anxiety was a bit too high for that time of the morning.

That thought, of course, turned into shock/bewilderment/overwhelm/fright upon hearing someone mention the fourth plane and then say "Do you have any idea what's going on right now?!"

As I thought of that day this week, I found myself wanting to remain quiet - once again - and I did in the moments that allowed that type of reflection. On the other sides of those moments, "things to do, life going on"...but once again, on the night of September 10, I did not sleep - nor did I on the night of September 11, 2009. On those nights I was neither shocked nor frightened...but I did again have the feeling that something was amiss.

So, after a sleepless night I left for the gym at 7:30am. At around 7:45am I stopped, as there were flowers on a monument here in Knoxville. Taking the time to view the monument - and feeling somewhat embarrassed at the fact that I was, although having been in Knoxville a few times over the past two years, really looking at the monument for the first time - I saw that it was a memorial to those who had died. Many names on this little obelisk on Main Street, and at the base lay flowers and pictures - testaments to those connected to this city who lost their lives on that day.

There are many thoughts, of course - some that I wish not to share - but I can only hope that in the days and years to come that I (and all of us) not only take the time to remember, but also to examine ourselves objectively while continuing to move forward in peace - and vigilance...and I find myself grateful for having been reminded that while life does indeed go on, it is vitally important for us as humans to honor our inner leanings at times of reflection.

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